Vulgar Latin

I confess to Almighty God …
Vulgar Latin
Listen on Audioboo
Confiteor Deo omni potenti,
beat ee Mariae semper Virgini,
beat oh Michaeli Archangelo,
beat oh Joanni Baptistae,
sanctis Apostolis Petro et Paulo,
omnibus Sanctis,
et tibee Pater:
quia peccavi nimis
cogitation ee
verbo,
et operay:
mea culpa,
mea culpa,
mea maxima culpa.
Ideo precor beatam Mariam semper Virginem,
beatum Michaelem Archangelum,
beatum Joannem Baptistam,
sanctos Apostolos Petrum et Paulum,
omnes Sanctos,
et te Pater,
orar ee pro me
ad Dominum Deum Nostrum.
*
Of crimes against humanity:
I absolve you.
Of crimes against the person:
I absolve you.
Of crimes against civility:
I absolve you.
Of crimes against rationalism:
I absolve you.
Of crimes against the child:
I absolve you.
Of sexually molesting those young priests:
I absolve you.
Of raping those choir boys:
I absolve you.
Of sexually harassing that 14 year old choir boy:
I absolve you.
Of raping those 7 minors between 1968 and 1997:
I absolve you.
Of raping those 26 children:
I absolve you.
Of sexual abusing those 37 young girls:
I absolve you.
Of molesting those 5 teenage boys:
I absolve you.
Of sexually abusing those 20 boys:
I absolve you.
Of raping and sexually abusing that girl and boy from 1991 until 2008:
I absolve you.
Of raping those minors between 1989 and 1992:
I absolve you.
Of those 40,000 images and films of child pornography:
I absolve you.
Of making your own child pornography:
I absolve you.
Of sexually abusing those 100 Inuit children over 30 years:
I absolve you.
Of sexually abusing those 4 Aboriginal boys between 1984 and 1991:
I absolve you.
Of forcing that 11-year old boy to perform oral sex:
I absolve you.
Of indecently assaulting those 8 boys, aged 10 to 13, over 20 years:
I absolve you.
Of sexually abusing and assaulted those 20 children between 1945 and 1989:
I absolve you.
Of sexually abusing all those children and teenagers from 1950 to 1984:
I absolve you.
Of sexually abusing that 13-year-old girl while in children’s hospital:
I absolve you.
Of sexually abusing that 9 year old on summer-camp:
I absolve you.
Of molesting those 200 deaf boys between 1950 and 1974:
I absolve you.
Of crimes against the weak who were supposed to inherit the Earth:
I absolve you.
Of sexually abusing those 20 disabled people over 16 years:
I absolve you.
Of sexually abusing those 121 mentally handicapped children in care from 1965 to 1998:
I absolve you.
Of sexually abusing that 11-year-old boy from 1994 until 2001:
I absolve you.
Of raping those 7 young boys (11–14 years) between 1992 and 1998:
I absolve you.
Of sexually abusing those 5 boys (8–12 years):
I absolve you.
Of molesting those 12 boys at that orphanage:
I absolve you.
Of molesting those 4 boys, 1 girl and 1 adult male:
I absolve you.
Of allowing that known pedophile to work as a priest:
I absolve you.
Of assisting in the rape of that 12-year-old girl over a six-month period:
I absolve you.
Of denying the existence of your own children:
I absolve you.
Of crimes against decency:
I absolve you.
Of crimes against me, you, your own and everybody else:
I absolve you.
Dominus noster Jesus Christus te absolvat;
et ego auctoritate ipsius te absolvo ab
omni vinculo excommunicationis
et interdicti
in quantum possum
et tu indiges.
Deinde,
ego te absolvo a peccatis tuis
in nomine Patris,
et Filii,
et Spiritus Sancti.
Amen.
**
One might even say,
secundum totus, errare humanum est.” ***
But that’s just a vulgar Latin.
Notes
* I confess to Almighty God,
to Blessed Mary ever Virgin,
to Blessed Michael the Archangel,
to Blessed John the Baptist,
to the Holy Apostles Peter and Paul,
to all the angels and saints,
and to you my brothers and sisters,
that I have sinned exceedingly in thought,
word,
deed.
through my fault,
through my fault,
through my most grievous fault,
and I ask Blessed Mary ever Virgin,
Blessed Michael the Archangel,
Blessed John the Baptist,
the Holy Apostles Peter and Paul,
all the Angels and Saints,
and you my brothers and sisters,
to pray for me
to the Lord our God.
** May our Lord Jesus Christ absolve you;
and by His authority I absolve you
from every bond of excommunication
and interdict,
so far as my power allows
and your needs require.
Thereupon,
I absolve you from your sins
in the name of the Father,
and of the Son,
and of the Holy Ghost.
Amen.
*** After all, to err is human.
Tim Minchin – Pope Song
Further reading
  • Cloyne report: Church failed to report all abuse cases link
  • Catholic Church sex abuse scandals around the world link
  • Looking behind the Catholic sex abuse scandal link
  • etc.

About JFDerry

Writer. Darwin, science & more. 4 books: Piospheres, Darwin in Scotland, Serial Killers. Current project is THE DISSENT OF MAN. Born near London, raised near Primrose Hill and in Lincolnshire, and studied at the Universities of Bangor, York and Edinburgh for degrees in Biochemistry, Bioelectronics and Biological Computation, and a PhD in African Ecology. Mainly working in British and African universities, but also in Spain, Brussels, Mongolia and Australia, to date, publication history is mostly in academic journals, on aspects of computational biology, pastoralism and on Charles Darwin and evolution. However, also written for several national newspapers, various governments, several major record labels and independent book publishers. Fiction has appeared at the Edinburgh International Book Festival and poetry is at the Human Genre Project. Lives in Edinburgh, with partner and their two daughters.
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25 Responses to Vulgar Latin

  1. meowington says:

    Get over it

    also, not poetry

  2. Nathanael says:

    Lovely work, depressing inspiration. Thank you and we’ll done. I must, however, note that it is the meek, not the week, who biblically are to inherit the earth. It still fits, though :)

  3. JFDerry says:

    thank you for you comment. “weak” was very much intended. “meek” would have implied supplication and submission, whereas these individuals likely did not have such choice in the matter. They were denied options and that weakened their position. The rhyme between “meek” and “weak” was used to suggest one while using the other.

  4. JFDerry says:

    Not a clever and erudite comment, “Get over it”. Get over the systematic abuse of countless children and helpless individuals? You are as ignorant about abuse in the catholic church as you are about poesy.

  5. Sam Ferrara says:

    That was truly wonderful.
    Now, we just need to get them all to SAY it.
    Not that they’ll mean anything they say; and will probably be fiddling with the poor child holding the prose for him anyway…..

  6. kirstin says:

    This is moving in many ways, how will our future generations look back on this? and does it still continue? thank you

  7. neil says:

    Its not the Catholic Protestant issue its those terrorists(Muslims) we both need to worry about

  8. jonno says:

    @Neil, that is so stupid on so many levels. might as well reductio ad hitlerum. you moron!

  9. @Neil, that is so stupid on so many levels. might as well reductio ad hitlerum. you moron!

  10. Very powerful poem.

  11. JFDerry says:

    Thank you for all your comments – yes, every one of them.

  12. Poppy says:

    What really worries me is that I work with a devoutly catholic woman who says that people were told to report any abuse to the police and that most of the reports are liars. Why does she say this… Because her priest told her this is the truth. I despair that any of the abused will get fair treatment and justice.

  13. Nicola says:

    Totally briliant. sombre, thought provoking but beautifully written. best read aloud over the audio boo.

  14. Dan says:

    Such a great poem, so much passion and yet unfortunately too true.
    This is one of the reasons i’m not religous because of the corruption that isn’t just through fiddling with children but also brainwashing.
    I love your poem, it speaks so loud and proud, i think i may print this and recite it to the world, shout it from the tallest building and whisper it to the little mice that run thoughout night.
    Thanks for such a great read. :)

  15. Kaitlyn says:

    In school we had to find a poem we thought was moving, I showed my teacher and even though I couldn’t show it in class( because of words like ‘rape’ and ‘sex’) I still got best mark so thank you for that x

  16. JFDerry says:

    That’s awesome thanX. To see feedback like that really makes writing worthwhile. atb, j.

  17. JFDerry says:

    Very touched. Thank you immensely.

  18. JFDerry says:

    I agree. thank you.

  19. JFDerry says:

    That is a concern, but blind faith, and to be blinded by faith, tragically is more the norm than exception. But, please do ask your colleague to read this post, and then tell her, every single case listed here is real and the cleric was proven guilty.

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